Sleep

An anonymous narrator reads things in the most deliberately boring monotone possible, and the content genuinely doesn't matter because you're asleep before it becomes relevant. Tax law, equipment manuals, whatever. The delivery is what does the work - flat, steady, hypnotically dull. Simple concept executed with commitment to the bit. If your brain needs something to listen to in order to quiet down but that something can't be interesting enough to keep you awake, this solves the paradox. Effective weaponized boredom.